All Things are Beautiful.

Today has been a pretty freaking good day. I found out that I am still insured by my mom's insurance, which means that I can go to the doctor if I need to! I ate lunch with my brothers today, which was nice because I haven't hung out with them in forever. Aaron and Michael are a freakin comedy duo, so it was a pleasure to hang out with them. The last time we hung out was sometime before February, when Mikey left for Boot Camp.

Me and Princess Di

Camera                                  
I finally got film for my Diana Mini today! I haven't played with it much because I had some technical difficulties loading the film, so I'm kinda put out with her right now. But tomorrow afternoon, Teri Beri and I are having a photo shoot featuring some of my newest creations (http://www.etsy.com/shop/KEDarce). I'm working on some pieces for the spring, which is what I'll be wearing, so it'll probably be a pretty chilly photo shoot... which means two things mainly. 1. I will not be shaving my legs, and 2. we will be drinking warm beverages. I'm really excited because I like both of those things. I decided to do "Don't Shave December" because "No Shave November" was such a hit with the ladfolk (i.e. not at all, but that's the point).  Anytime Teri and I hang out, we have a ton of fun so I know it'll be a really good time.
 I've never played with a 35mm camera before, so it's cool to just snap a bunch of different shots. I love the fact that working with analogue film is the exact opposite of instant gratification, which is something I've grown so accustomed to with my snazzy Nikon Digital camera. It's good experience to get comfortable with film though because it will be my life for the next year, at the least. I studied film when I went to Tulsa tech a few years back, but it's been a while. I'm not as well-versed in analogue camera lingo as I once was, but it's okay. I'll get back into the groove once I go back to tech school for photography.
Nostalgia                                
My mom refuses to use her digital camera and always carries around a yellow and black, brick-sized, Kodak disposable camera. It used to embarrass me when I was younger because she would always whip out her camera and insist on a group photo of whoever was around. But now I'm going to start doing that with my Diana because we really aren't promised tomorrow. I want to be able to remember every little trip and visit of these crazy, ever-changing times in my life. The pictures that my mom has of us as a family will be around for a really long time. It's one thing to browse through someone's Facebook pictures, but it's a whole different world of romance looking at old photos of my parents when they were in grade school. Seeing pictures of them sitting in their classic Ford before leaving for church, or when they were losing all their baby teeth. Those everyday changes that we go through in life are what I want to document, because it's the day-to-day things we do that speak volumes of who we really are.
All changes seem subtle, but when looked at in a five minute slideshow at the ending celebration of your life, the personal growth and changes embodied in your aging won't seem so snail-paced. It's all about the little things that may seem simple and not worth taking pictures of at the time. But, when my children are my age and I pull out photo albums of me at age twenty, I want them to look at them and be like "Wow, Mom. You were hot at twenty." "Damn straight, children. I was smokin'... and still am." That's what I'm gonna say.
Air Force Bidness                      
I went on Wednesday for my monthly weigh/check-in at my recruiter's office in Tulsa. He asked me if I would be interested in going to the Air Force Academy, and I was like "Uh, sure". It was not the most reassuring answer I've ever given, but I made it clear that I was interested last night at the AF DEP  family potluck. I asked for more information about it and he said he'd send it to me. He introduced me to his boss, who booked my job for Broadcast. He told me he was really excited for me and asked "Do you realize how much of a golden nugget your job is?" and I honestly answered no. He enthusiastically informed me that it was, indeed, a very special job and that he really hopes that I go on to the Air Force Academy because it would put me that much further ahead in my job field. After talking with them briefly about the application process for the Academy, discussing my GPA situation, and age appeals, I am convinced that I can get it, with a little ambition and a lot of persistence. At the end of our conversation, we made a deal that I would get an emblem printed on canvas for him and all of the recruiters under him in exchange for the hook up and more information on getting into the academy. I'm that good, ladies and gents. We shook on it and everything.

Michael told me that if I do that, once I finish my degree, I'll become an officer. And, at the end of my six years, I'll most likely be a Captain which is really nice, salary-wise. So really all I need to find now is a trophy husband that would like to join me on this crazy adventure that I'm about to go on. I'm going to be in Maryland for approximately one year for tech school, (if I get into the academy) about two years in Colorado Springs, CO, and then God knows where after that. I know if I were a dude I'd be like "I think I'll pass and wait til you settle down," but here's the thing, boys. I don't know when that will happen, if ever. I really want to do short-term missions somewhere if/when I get out of the Air Force, maybe in Kenya. I've got some connections with an orphanage down there, which would be so wonderful to be a part of. So if you're not man enough, that's fine. It's no one's loss really.

Art, Love, and Jesus                     
I am really thrilled about all the wonderful things that the Lord has enabled me to do. I skyped with one of my best friends tonight and it was so wonderful to see her beautiful face. I was telling her about all the fun things I get to make for my little store. It's so encouraging to talk to someone who believes in you and tell you that. It seems every time Brooke and I talk, she and I discuss precisely what the Lord has been telling me in my quiet time. She's the mouthpiece of my conscience. I love her, and there's really nothing else to say about it. And I'm not saying that I love her casually because I am so tired of that word being thrown around. I realized I've made a bad habit of it, and I'm trying to change that. Because God is love, and I would never throw around the name of Jesus on a daily basis. When I tell Jesus that I love Him, I mean it from my heart. But when I say I love a jacket I saw online, I don't. I want that word to become as sacred to me as the name of Jesus, because they are, after all, synonymous for each other.

Plans                                    
When I woke up this morning, my plans for New Years Eve were not on my mind. But after adding a mutual friend of mine and Brooke's on Facebook and chatting about the Harp and Lyre show that's going down, that all changed. I am now going to Oklahoma City for that night and I am super duper thrilled about it. I get to see Brooke and meet her fly friend Samantha, the Harp and Lyre boys and maybe Jackie Porter, my all-time favorite Jackie. I cannot put words to just how excited I am. The best part about it was that I threw the idea out to Brooke about road tripping to Oklahoma City that night instead of coming here to Owasso for a sleepover, and she immediately called me to inform me that she and Samantha were already planning on doing just that, and that the invitation was officially extended to me. Needless to say, I had to breathe with my head between my knees, lay on the ground for a bit, dance it out, then make a celebratory cup of coffee. I've never been more excited in my life for New Years.
Last year for New Years, I went to a Phi Tau house party. I was stranded in Stillwater, working all last Christmas break at Hideaway. This year the holidays are already much more enjoyable because 1. I didn't have finals, and 2. I'm not alone in a ten story building. I am so shocked that I wasn't more afraid for my life. I easily could have been raped and murdered in the shower, and no one would have ever heard me scream. Praise the Lord that's over.

Ending Thoughts                          
I am so thrilled about everything that God is doing in my life, and I love how He loves me. And I mean that. I am so so so blessed to have this time of solitude to re-evaluate my priorities, and pour myself into refining my talents and work ethic for His glory. He's given me this time to know Him better on a one-on-one level, and consequently find my own identity through this growth process. The first few months of this fall were murder on my little heart because there were so many unknowns and so much waiting without a clear end in sight. But now that has all changed and He's giving me insight into my future, and hope that there is an adventurous life for me to live. It's all part of His plan. I always knew I was meant for more, and He's proving that to be true in His timing.


"All things are beautiful in His timing."
Ecclesiastes 3:11


El Fin